15 posts tagged “harry potter”
We are having our branch Halloween party. Sadly, I don't have a costume, so I will probably have to dig my Harry Potter stuff out of the closet. Unfortunately, most of my HP stuff is unwearable, unless I'm outside at the REAL Hogwarts.
This scarf is about 3 mm thick and handknitted from Peruvian wool by house-elves. I only wear it when there's ice on the ground. I have a matching Hatmione. And I still have yarn in that colour, so maybe I should make some Hermittens, too. (All I can say is that the Sorting Hat suggested Ravenclaw to Hermione, but she chose Gryffindor.)
I have spent a great deal of time writing about what a douchebag J.K. "Me Fans Are All Stupid Pigs" Rowling is. But at least she's not a total douchebag. She donated some of her pocket change to the Labour Party, as she thought they would do a better job helping poor families.
The 43-year-old writer, known to be a personal friend of Labour Prime Minister Gordon Brown and his wife, Sarah, was critical of David Cameron's opposition Conservative party, referring to the party's platform of tax breaks for married people.
"It sends the message that the Conservatives still believe a childless, dual-income but married couple is more deserving of a financial pat on the head than those struggling, as I once was, to keep their families afloat in difficult times," Rowling said.
Good for her.
J.K. Rowling got it wrong. Lord Thingy's birthday is NOT on December 31st, as she states in her epic gas-fest, Harry Potter and the Half Baked Beans. It is, in fact, today.
Sadly, I didn't get a chance to ask Thingy if he had an iTunes account so that I could gift him some David Archuleta music. Alternatively, I could have bought him something from Princess Jorbacca or Brain Melotard. I suspect that he already has Jorbacca's crap album though. He listens to it in his car when he's not listening to Il Divo.
Sanjaya is far too awesome to waste on the likes of Thingy.
...oh, who am I kidding? Of course, I'm buying it.
The Tales of Beedle the Bard will be released to the rest of us Muggles on December 4th. And JKR has signed her royalties over to a charity. It's a book of five stories. Wonder if it will be written in runes?
Now, if JKR will only admit that she was wrong and that the Dark Lord's birthday is August 28th, not December 31st. (I'm not holding my breath. I mean, she actually thinks that Harry/ Ginny was good. Gag me.)
Today, there was an 5.4 earthquake in southern California. We were watching a CNN news story about it at lunch; apparently, people noticed it in Las Vegas. Someone commented "I wonder if [Lord Thingy] felt it in Las Vegas?" Someone else wanted to know what Thingy was doing in Vegas. I explained that there was a Death Eaters' convention in Las Vegas (Carly Plant and Song-Stealing Aussie Douchebag are the entertainers this year), and that the earthquake probably messed up Thingy's hair. Although maybe marching around the ballroom singing "Yellow Rose of Texas" did that too.
Too bad JRK didn't stage the Death Eaters' Jamboree at the beginning of Deathly Hollows in Las Vegas. Now that would have been cool. (Too cool for JRK, anyways.) Hey, if Danny DeVito can stage Roald Dahl's Matilda in southern California....
Incidentally, I read that the trailer for Half Blood Prince is out. Since the book sucked, big time, I think I'll wait for it to come on T.V. (Just like I'm doing for Order of the Phoenix. And just like I'll do for Deathly Hollows. That book warped my fragile little mind.)
So far, the best part of tonight's "Simpsons" episode was the "Harry Potter" parody. The family lined up to buy the last "Angelica Button" book. Comic Book Guy made fun of Lisa's Angelica Button costume, until Lisa pointed out that she based her costume on the book. The best part of the scene? The bit where Lisa read the book in the car on the way home, found it ended with "All was well," and chucked the book out the window of the car. That's what I would have liked to have done with "Deathly Hollows."
As for the main plot: Lisa took up ballet and found out that breathing second-hand smoke made her a better dancer. And Marge channelled Papa Archuleta (see one of my last "Idol" posts). Stupid Marge. Too bad HOMER had to play concerned parent.
Homer, in the meantime, had a smokehouse in the basement and started making his own beef jerky. Unfortunately, some raccoons had different ideas. I once worked with a guy who was plagued with raccoons (they ripped up his newly-sodded lawn, and he declared war on them), so I could understand Homer's pain. Anyways, Homer was about to kill the raccoons (with a cleaver and a scary knife), when he looked into their den and realized that the raccoons resembled his own family.
I love episodes that centre around Lisa. Unfortunately, this one solidifies my theory that Marge secretly hates Lisa and is plotting to undermine her. (But it was a really good one, nonetheless.)
Contrary to anything that J.K. Rowling might have written in her books, The Dark Lord is still alive and well and lurking among us. Then again, what the hell does she know? Lord Thingy was certainly inspired today. I ran into him at Reception today, and he said "So, it's been thirty years, eh?"
"Thirty years since what?" I asked.
"Since the event," he replied.
"Since the alleged event," I shot back.
"Just think," Lord Thingy said, smirking, "you've been in denial for thirty years." And then his elevator came.
I think he's hoping that J.K. Rowling will write more about him in the HP Encyclopedia.
I received the book at a bit after noon today. The Muggle post took the directions on the box literally and tried to deliver on Saturday. (Which would have been impossible, since our building is closed then.) Naturally, I started reading on my lunch hour, which was actually reduced to about fifteen minutes because I had to e-mail Bill with my comments about the series.
The book isn't bad, although I get violently nauseous every time she puts in anything that remotely smells like Harry/ Ginny. Here's a particularly gagworthy example:
...and then [Ginny] was kissing him as she had never kissed him before, and Harry was kissing her back, and it was blissful oblivion, better than Firewhisky; she was the only real thing in the would, Ginny, the feel of her, one hand at her back and one in her long, sweet-smelling hair....
DH, p. 99
I think I'm going to throw up now.
Fortunately, Gin-Gin has stayed far, far away from the action. Even typing that quote made me want to projectile vomit. Actually, she hardly gets mentioned AT ALL. Praise the Deity of Your Choice!
Anyway, the story opens at Lucius's house. Moldy is hosting a Death Eaters' soiree, and Lucius, Narcissa, and Draco are pretty pissed over having to host it. Good help is hard for the Malfoys to find, especially after Dobby serenaded Lucius with "Take This Job and Shove It" in Chamber of Secrets, and it doesn't help that Voldy Avada Kedavras the servants whenever they displease him. Although JKR didn't mention it in the book, Voldy also Avada Kedavra'd the caterer and the Malfoys' pool boy (for putting too much chlorine in the water). Besides, those damn Death Eaters always drink the most expensive wines. And no one ever offers to help clean up afterwards. Especially when Voldy's party piece involves killing off the former Muggle Studies instructor at Hogwarts and feeding her to Nagini.
But I digress. Snapey is also a guest at the party, and he's keeping Moldy updated on what the Order of the Phoenix is up to. Specifically, they plan to move Harry out of Privet Drive and into the Big Brother house. Or something like that. Snapey is evil. Got it.
When the Order finally moves Harry out of Casa Dursley, they find that the Odour-Eaters have caught on to them, and there's a dogfight that is almost, but not quite, as cool as the one in the first Star Wars. Unfortunately, there are a few casualties.
Oh, and there's some Dumbledore backstory. Dad was imprisoned for killing Muggles; Mum and Sis died, too, and Albus became estranged from his brother Aberforth, who later changed his name to William Sianis and moved to Chicago. We find out who R.A.B. is (yes, it's who everyone thought it was) and what really happened to him. Hermione went to the library and found out a bit more about creating and deconstructing Horcruxes, which is always handy information to have on hand. And it turned out that Albus left a little somethin somethin for each of the kids in his will. Good for him.
As with Half Blood Prince, the really cool parts (Horcruxes! Dumbledore! The Tales of Beedle the Bard!) more than make up for the crap. I may actually survive reading this.
I made the mistake of visiting Chapters today. Of course, there's a table on the main floor piled high with copies of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows. (And, of course, I sneaked a peek--Snapey opens the book this time and he's telling one of the delegates at the Death Eaters' Coffeeklatch what the Odour of the Phoenix has planned for Harry Potter.) When I went into the Starbucks next to Chapters, every other person was reading Deathly Hollows. It took all the discipline I had NOT to pull out my credit card and buy myself a copy.
I hope JKR has written in a scene where Dudley dumps a Horcrux down the Dursleys' garbage disposal and turns it on. (Or he can stick in in a microwave. I'm not fussy.)
Dobby now handed Harry a small package, which turned out to be - socks.
"Dobby is making them himself, sir!" the elf said happily. "He is buying the wool with his wages, sir!"
The left sock was bright red, and had a pattern of broomsticks upon it; the right sock was green, with a pattern of Snitches.
"They're...they're really...well, thanks, Dobby," said Harry, and he pulled them on, causing Dobby's eyes to leak with happiness.
J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, p. 356.
D'oh! (Although how did Harry know which sock was the left one and which one was the right one? Unless Dobby knit him a pair of tabi socks....) Anyways, I'm not taking the picture over again.
Additional comments (on the pattern and the modifications I made to it) are over here. The socks were knit from DGB Confetti (the yellow is Phildar Preface).
